Roots and wings are the gift Christian parents pass on to our children. We establish rules, give them responsibilities that build confidence and skill, and we water those deep roots with lots of love and prayer, knowing that strengthening wings will soon carry our children away from home, out of reach of our influence and our protection. Now, in my family, there is one more full-fledged adult as my third son has graduated from college.
In my prayers for the four young men who are so close to my heart, I’m taking my cues from the book of Philippians. Writing from a Roman prison, Paul the missionary church planter tips his hand and opens his heart to reveal Paul the spiritual father. His prayers for new believers and leaders in faraway fledgling churches have fueled my own prayer life as one-by-one my sons leave the nest to make independent lives and decisions in a world very different from the one I encountered at their age.
Prayers for strong marriages, safety on the job, or wisdom in college selection are all good and specific requests from the heart of a Christian mum, but Paul’s three-verse, single-sentence out pouring to God challenges me to lift my sights to motivation, to pray about the drive behind my adult children’s following lives—and to take a careful look at my own.
In this season of graduations and weddings, many of us are releasing freshly minted adults into the world. It’s always a delight to partner with Desiring God where, today, I’m writing about praying for our adult children, and the ways we can find ourselves being continually shaped and stretched by our prayers.
Photo by Dane Deaner on Unsplash
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Awww, Michele, what powerful prayers! I have never thought to pray for my boys’ loves. That was a bit of a brain-bender for me. I’m definitely beginning to pray about that, as of today. You have so much insight. Thanks for sharing this wisdom!
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Oh, Lord have mercy, you are going to discover so many things in the coming years, Jeanne, that you never thought to pray for, but suddenly it’s front and center in your life. God is good, and he carries the parenting load alongside us, and for this I am very grateful.
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So wise. Paul’s prayers are good for our every day lives and especially for our children. My youngest will be 40 this year and letting go was the hardest part of being a mother….still is. I know that as a mother I have a powerful voice of prayer before my Heavenly Father for my children. In His Word He speaks often of parents and grandparents and as we honor Him He honors us…in our daily lives, our daily prayers and blesses our children, their children and their children’s children(Deut. 28). So thankful for a loving God who cares for our families.
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Yes, a “powerful voice of prayer.” That’s good for me to hear, Michelle, as sometimes we feel unheard as we parent teens, and I know for a fact that God hears well.
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Yes He does. It’s never easy to be a mother, but I wouldn’t want to face any part of it without His love and guiding hand.
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That’s for sure. We need regular infusions of wisdom, and the safety valve of prayer!
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Absolutely!
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Excellent!
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Thank you, Susie! You know your opinion is valued here.
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This is such grounded sound counsel, my friend. Thank you for your well-thought-out words here. I forwarded this to our daughter and daughter-in-law. Our daughter just had someone graduate from college who is off to medical school and a daughter bound for college many miles away after graduating from high school.
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Yes, I have enjoyed seeing the pictures you’ve been sharing here and there of all the great milestones your family is reaching! Thanks for passing along the article!
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Beautiful post! I love praying Scripture for my children.
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Thank you, Kim! So good to hear from you!
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I like that you changed from praying for material things for your sons to praying for the qualities to keep them striving and succeeding. #DreamTeam
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It’s so automatic to pray for the things we see and value. I’m thankful for the push to lean into prayer for the invisible qualities that are truly valuable and lasting.
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Whew! I just got finished fussing at my 7-year olds individually. One lost his glasses, the other his inhaler. My patience is not good right now. I definitely have to cover them and this journey in prayer.
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Oh, yes, and it’s during those times of frustration that we need him most. Hope all the lost items have been found!
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Great advice, Michele. I have never been married or had children, but I do pray for other people’s children and watch them as they grow and mature. There are so many things to pray for starting before they are born, and there is no end of the things they will need throughout their lives even when they are on their own. Your boys are blessed to have a praying mom. Many don’t have that privilege. May the Lord bless you as you continue to pray for them and their futures.
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Some of our family’s most faithful supporters and prayer warriors have been single women and childless couples, so I know from experience that YOU are a blessing to the people in your life.
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Such well-chosen themes for the prayers centered on our children–and grandchildren! Thank you, Michele.
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They come right from the pen of the Apostle Paul! I’m grateful for the deep dive I’ve been taking into Philippians 1 this year.
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I love your first line, Michele! So true. Congratulations to your college graduate son. You must be a good teacher both in and out of homeschool. Your children are learning to use their wings, which is what we want and pray for!
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Oh, thanks, Laurie! You can thank the editors at DG for dredging that first line out of my brain. I was going to jump right into the part about Paul, but they asked me for a story to begin with, and that’s what come of it.
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“Roots and wings are the gift Christian parents pass on to our children.” What a beautiful paradox. Thanks, Michele.
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It is beautiful when we see it lived out in the experience of our grown up kids!
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It is just a few short years until I will be seeing my oldest off into the world. I know it will be here before I know it. It is such a peaceful thing to remember that they will not go alone since God goes before them.
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That’s a valuable piece of data to carry forward into all your parenting transitions!
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Must be bitter sweet watching them grow and knowing you have to let go. I’m off to read your post on Desiring God.
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Yes, definitely bittersweet. So much good, and so much to miss.
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PS: Couldn’t comment there. But I read your lovely post.
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Yes, a number of the larger sites do not have comments open, which I suppose is a way of protecting themselves, but I do miss the dialogue. Thank you for making the effort to circle back around here. I appreciate your presence.
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I pray for my children often, but they are still not branching out alone.
Lovely post.
#abitofeverything
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We do our best parenting, I think, from a kneeling posture. I need to be there more.
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Michele,
I’m right there with you! We have four adult “children” and it’s such a precarious stage for them all. So many decisions to make that are shaping their future. Our prayers are the most powerful gift we can give them at this stage.
Praying you Stay Blessed & Refreshed Today!
~Sherry
xoxo
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We love them so much, don’t we!
Thanks for this reminder to stay faithful in the discipline of prayer.
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Michele,
I am especially praying for #2 – my children’s integrity. Right now, I am not their friend, because I am standing firm in my beliefs and will not cave to or appease their worldly viewpoints. It is really hard to be estranged from those you love with all your heart. But, God…He is able to soften their hearts. More than a relationship with me, I pray for my children to have an intimate relationship with their Lord and Savior. Great prayers for me to pray today and encouragement to help me remain strong in the Lord.
Blessings,
Bev xx
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Thanks, Bev, for reading here–I know this post hits on a tender spot for you, and appreciate your brave interaction. Continuing to pray along with you for your heart’s desire.
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This is great, Michele! Prayer is one of the least utilized tools in the Christian toolbelt, yet it is one of the most powerful. How ironic. I love the thought you began with, “Roots and wings are the gifts Christian parents pass on to their children.” I once heard a man I have a great deal of respect for say, “Children are a message sent to a place we’ll never go.” It’s so true, isn’t it? I love the Desiring God ministry and all that they do over there. Headed over to read the rest of your post. Thanks so much for linking up at InstaEncouragements! May God bless your family!
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What an inspiring thought–and it’s so true! My kids do things that would never have occurred to me.
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As a mama whose oldest child is about to move out into her own apartment this was particularly encouraging to me. Our daughter is a wonderful godly your woman and I am so delighted to see what God has in store for her in this new season of life but it is bittersweet at times. So happy to have found you via Candidly Christian this morning!
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Yes, bittersweet is the prefect description.
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Adult children & grandchildren add a whole new dimension to our world’s & prayer life Michele! I have 3 daughters, 3 step daughter’s & 10 grandchildren + their partners so my prayer life is very full 😉
Bless you,
Jennifer
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Full heart!
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Thank you so much for sharing with the #DreamTeam Thought provoking as always. My kids are little, but there are things for the future here!
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It will be here before you know it. I am still in awe of these grown up guys.
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I love the opening to this post, it is true inset it we begin with giving them the roots, like a plant hoping we have planted the seed in the best soil, watered it, given it sun and nurtured and loved it enough to grow, and then we also want to give them wings and the courage to use them. I haven’t hatter to the stage yet in motherhood where mine are ready to fly, but I hope and I pray I am doing enough so when they are ready to fly they will soar. Thanks for linking up for #ABLOGGINGGOODTIME
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Yes, we do everything with that day in mind. And it comes quickly…
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My children are both adults now, and I’ve now realised that you never stop worrying about them and wishing the very best for them
#abitofeverything
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It’s definitely an adjustment to transition to adulthood with our kids, but we never ever stop loving them.
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Reblogged this on Praying for the millennials.
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That’s a great gift!
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