Over 25 years ago, I began reading the Bible with a friend who lived well into her nineties. Our friendship withstood the Proverbs 17:17 test (“A friend loves at all times”), enduring numerous life changes and geographical challenges as we extended a welcome to each other through our changing seasons.
Sadly, a long-haul friendship like ours is unusual. Very few friendships stand the test of time. Geographical challenges are daunting. Differences of opinion divide. The constant upheaval of schedules and the ever-present ticking of the clock have made friendship seem like a luxury we can’t afford or something we’ll make time for later.
That’s why I’m writing about deep friendship for Desiring God. Sadly, my sweet friend passed away while my article was still in the editorial process. I had hoped to surprise her when it was published—but she surprised me by rushing home to be with Jesus at the age of 96. May the story of our long-haul friendship inspire you to take the first steps toward meaningful connection with someone in your circle of friends. A click on the button below will take you there…
Holding You in the Light,
Loneliness is the fruit of lives that are scheduled to the point of strangulation. Trust for grace to make room for the friendships we so desperately need.
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Great article, Michele! I love the emphasis not only on friendship, but multi-generational friendship. Our ladies’ group has been talking about mentoring lately. That wasn’t a buzzword when I was younger. But when I was in college, a new family in my church learned that I came to church alone and invited me over, starting a friendship that lasted until both the husband and wife died. I called them my adoptive spiritual family. I don’t think the wife consciously thought about taking me under her wing, but I learned so much just from observing how she interacted with her husband and children and her spiritual walk. She offered valuable advice from time to time, but mostly I learned from just being together.
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I smiled about the “buzzword.” You’re right, but it certainly was a happening thing, even though we didn’t know what to call it. ☺️
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Michele, thank you for sharing your lifelong spiritual friendship. What a legacy of faith and commitment you both have lived out together … and commitment to His Word. What a gift you gave each other, and Him.
May many people who read your story desire to do the same with someone in their lives. So incredibly awesome and Christ-honoring.
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That would be so wonderful. When we open ourselves to a deep friendship, we take a risk, but we also receive richness that’s unavailable inside our brittle little world.
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A lovely tribute to a very special friend & friendship Michele. I’ve had five such friendships, two were ladies much older than I & I deeply valued those two friends right up to their graduation to Heaven.
Another two friends were similar age to me with such beautiful & long friendships (one from High School) that lasted until they too were both called home to be with Jesus. And one that’s still going since 1986!
Thank you for a reminder to be open to new friendships.
May you & your family enjoy a special time this weekend remembering the blessing we have in Jesus.
Blessings, Jennifer
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Thank you, Jennifer! We have both been blessed beyond words in our history of faithful friendships.
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Absolutely Michele! ☺️
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Some friendships that are lifelong are sometimes a flow and ebb with seasons – and how beautiful it is when in another season, they flow right back. I thank God for the older friendships that mentored through kindness and sharing of themselves with me – what an impact they had. I am so sorry for the loss of your friend. What a beautiful journey you two walked on together!
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I have a few “low-maintenance friends” whom I see very infrequently, and we don’t have to explain why we’ve neglected each other for however long, but we just pick up where we left off and enjoy talking and praying together. I imagine that the party in heaven will be like that!
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A terrific article, Michele! Thank you for sharing with us the meaningful friendship you enjoyed with an older woman. Very encouraging to me. I’m the older one in several relationships with younger moms. At first I had to wonder if they were just being kind, but soon learned they really do want to benefit from the voice of experience and wisdom we senior citizens have gathered along the way. I believe it’s a sign of their maturity. (Those who feel that older people are irrelevant and out-of-touch haven’t reached that level yet!)
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I am absolutely certain that you are a true gift to anyone who is fortunate enough to be your in-person friend. You are an encouragement to me in our virtual community!
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A lovely article – you were blessed! ~ Rosie
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I really was, and am so grateful!
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This is a beautiful story of a remarkable “long-haul” friendship, Michele. I found this especially amazing: “Only in the past year, I learned that my friend (stalwart Sunday school teacher, deacon’s wife, and lifelong church lady) didn’t have a settled practice of digging into Scripture until we started reading together!” God used each of you in the other’s life, as only He can do. I have one more day of Ezekiel in my own Bible reading plan, and what I would give for even a few snippets of you and your friend’s thoughts about this book. (Am I allowed to say that there have been times when I wondered if I would EVER finish?) I’m sorry she is no longer here, and I’m also very thankful for the 25 years you had together.
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Oh, I so identify with your feelings about Ezekiel! I’m coming to the end of the reading plan we were working on together, and it’s going to be so strange and sad to go forward into a new schedule.
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