Sunday Scripture
I remember clearly the momentous day when, deep in the weeds of Toddler Parenting, I realized I could do everything “right” and still end up with a wayward child. I could wear out a blender pureeing fresh veggies. I could teach and expect obedience, model polite manners, sing hymns at the breakfast table, and diligently foster reading readiness, but my little bundles of DNA were free to throw all those advantages to the wind, squander every opportunity for success, and reject a godly lifestyle.
Fast forward twenty something years, and I’m grateful that not one of my worst nightmares came true. (One of the greatest gifts of being a pessimist is hardly anything ever turns out as badly as I expect it to…) However, I’m well aware that you may have a different and more disappointing story.
Mother’s Day next week is, for some women, an endurance contest in which you straighten your shoulders, lean into stiff-upper-lip mode, and soldier through the day. Perhaps your own mother was not present for you, either by choice or by hardship, and your heart still aches. Have your kids made choices you can’t endorse (or even imagine)? Do you have regrets about your own mothering story and long for a relationship with your son or your daughter, but the distance widens as your hope wanes?
God, the Disappointed Parent
Let me remind you that God also has sat in the seat of the disappointed parent. With him, you need not pretend. God knows your heart, understands your sorrow, and God is the one and only person who can stand beside you with full empathy.
If you are dreading Mother’s Day this year, remember that God also has sat in the seat of the disappointed parent.
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No Condemnation and No Magic Formula
Understand, first, that your story for Mother’s Day 2021 need not be condemnation or shame. At the risk of prescribing medication for a heart condition I barely understand, may I suggest that this Mother’s Day can be a new beginning for you as you commit yourself to focused prayer for your children?
No matter how you feel about your own parenting or how well (or disastrously!) you were parented, you can sign on as your own children’s chief prayer warrior. I’ve created a resource to help you get started with biblical prayers for your kids. Straight from my own prayer notebook, these are the requests I’ve been carrying to God for my own sons for over twenty years.
We will begin by asking God to rain righteousness on ourselves and our children! He’s the source of all that’s good, and apart from him, there is no salvation, no godly family line, and no growth in grace.
“Shower, O heavens, from above,
Isaiah 45:8
and let the clouds rain down righteousness;
let the earth open, that salvation and righteousness may bear fruit;
let the earth cause them both to sprout;
I the Lord have created it.”
Understand, second, that there is no magic formula, no set of words to “guarantee” our kids’ safety or spirituality (see paragraph one above), and yet I have found praying the words of Scripture for my children guards my heart from asking for scorpions and stones that look to me like fish and bread in the moment.
Free Printable for You
Complete the form below to receive the free Prayer Warrior Challenge Printable in your email inbox. Want to know more about me before you sign up? We can get acquainted here where you can even listen in on a podcast interview where I talk about my family and life here on the hill.
Remember, as your son or daughter’s mum, you are in the perfect position to pray for them. Make this Mother’s Day a new beginning in your mothering life. Take the challenge and commit to praying for your children every single day!
Grace be with you all,
Praying the words of Scripture for my children guards my heart from asking for scorpions and stones that look to me like fish and bread in the moment.
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Stumped in your search for a Mother’s Day gift for your mum, mentor, daughter, or favorite aunt?
The Joyful Life summer issue on Rest is now available for pre-order, and the single issue (or an annual subscription) is a thoughtful remembrance that lasts. Click here to subscribe or to check out their shop, which is full of gift ideas and resources to enhance your own walk with God.
And as always, you can also subscribe to Living Our Days blog to get regular content delivered to your inbox twice a week. Just enter your e-mail address in the field at the top of this page. If you’re encouraged by what you read here, be sure to spread the word!
Thank you Michele, I sure did need to hear you words of wisdom. Great lesson. Blessings.
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Thanks for reading!
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Michele, this is such a wonderful challenge. I am sure my life was prayed for by my grandma and mom. May I be faithful as well to pray for my children and grandchildren.
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I want to persevere in that faithfulness!
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You are a great writer thanx.
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We should always be praying for our children, Michele. Thanks for this reminder that no matter how we did as parents or were parented, God is our eternal and loving Father who loves us.
Blessings!
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There is no mess too big for God to fix!
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As a mom of many years, I realize that God does rain down salvation and righteousness in His time not mine. I keep praying still, and am thankful for how he blessed my hubby and me with ours. As the saying goes ‘parenting is not for sissies’, but glad he’s been there in the bad and good times with raising them. His influence helped my influence for positive outcome. A mom never stops praying for good for our babies.
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Oh, how true that our kids never outgrow the need for prayer.
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I remember at some point being stunned by that same realization–that even if I could do everything seemingly “right,” that would still be no guarantee that my kids would make godly choices. That cast me right back into dependence on the Lord–exactly where He wanted me. Praying Scripture does help us pray according to His will.
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Yes, we had to realize the importance of free will and that God loves our kids more than we do!
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It is scary, but there is no magic formula that we can follow that guarantees that our kids will turn out. We do our best and trust God. Parenting helps teach us how little control we have on others. So we pray.
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Our lack of control does send us running to prayer– a good place to be.
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Thank you for sharing these words of hope and encouragement! Mother’s Day is a perfect opportunity for us to renew our energies in praying for our children, and for our sisters in Christ too.
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A new beginning!
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I am in England where we celebrated mother’s day in March, seems ages ago now#mischiefandmemories@_karendennis
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Yes, I remember reading Mother’s Day posts back on March. Double dose!
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A beautiful sentiment as always Michele. Trust in yourself and the Lord that although we may not always have been perfect in our parenting endeavours, we always did our best. I believe that is the best lesson I’ve passed onto my children and such a blessing when I hear them repeating the refrain. I continue to pray for them all.
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Yes, there is so much grace for us.
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Thank you Michele for these kind words. I like to remind myself that we are all doing the best we can with the tools we have in this moment. I had a close relationship with my mother before she passed away a year and a half ago, and I am fortunate to have close (emotionally and geographically) relationships with my grown daughters. Even with that, I still struggled some with Mother’s Day for years…feeling inadequate on either end, as daughter and mother. We are perfectly imperfect beings. I know I love them and they love me. That’s the most important thing.
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So sorry to hear about the loss of.your mum.
We both have much to be grateful for in our loving families!
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Thanks for the encouragement, Michele, and for the reminder to continue praying for our kids. I’m a bit of a perfectionist, so it’s a challenge to let go of trying to do everything the right way.
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I struggled with that as well, Shannon. We need to rest in him.
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…we are looking forward to a Mother’s Day that approaches normal!
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Togetherness is the most important part.
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Oh to commit our energy to focused prayer instead of imagining worst case scenarios or reliving our past mistakes as mamas …
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Turning our anxiety into prayer points
Trusting God’s forgiveness and his ability to work in spite of our failure
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Dear Michele, I think you really got into my head and heart this time! Mother’s Day has been one of my least favorite days of the year for a very long time. ‘Nuf said. Thank you for the encouragement to be our children’s prayer warrior. I recently reminded my daughter that gauging by the worlds my other two choose to live in currently, I MUST PRAY & BELIEVE FOR THEM, if I don’t, who will? It it a boundless challenge when no light seems to be on their horizons. Praise God, He never gives us a challenge without giving us His help as well. I hope your Mother’s Day is filled with strong men hugs and grandbaby kisses!
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My sweet friend, somehow I didn’t know this was part of your story, and I am so sorry. It does not surprise me.to hear your faith-filled response, and I am trusting your words here will be an encouragement to other readers.
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I recall making corsages to give out at Mother’s Day at church in high school, mothers were given flowers for different categories, then there were sad services at other churches no one wanted to attend. But is supposed to be a joyful time and mothers should celebrate knowing He cares for them. Pray for all children, they need it,
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What a great memory!
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Thank you so much for your comforting words in my pain.
Thankful.
https://kostbaar.blogspot.com/
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Oh, Aritha, I am so sorry for your pain. I am grateful to have spoken into your sadness with comfort.
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Wonderful advice, Michele. I think all of us can think of choices our children have made that would not be our choices. A reminder that God has every right to be disappointed in us, and yet…somehow is not disappointed but delighted, is welcome at this time of year. All children deserve to be the subjects of our fervent prayers.
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Certainly a great reason to be thankful!
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In spite of the mistakes and failures of the past, we can carry hope into the future as our children’s chief prayer warriors. Thank you for the encouragement, Michele!
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Beautiful, Nancy!
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Michele, I found your perspective refreshing on the topic of dreading Mother’s Day-perhaps because I DO dread Mother’s day every year. As the mother of two prodigals, and other painful connections, I prefer hiding out at home the second Sunday of May. I have found encouragement here today, and am grateful I stopped by! Thank you!
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I am so sorry, Donna, to hear the sorrow in your words, and I honor your resilience in producing the beautiful post you shared at your site.
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Michele, it’s such a beautiful position–chief prayer warrior for our children! Thank you for these thoughtful reflections on a holiday that evokes such mixed emotions. I personally love celebrating with my husband and girls but have never forgotten those days when infertility made me want to give the side eye to the very mention of Mother’s Day. And now, of course, there’s the absence of my own mom … but I think you’ve given me something else to be grateful for as I think of her, and that was her faithful prayers for me my whole life. Happy Mother’s Day to you, my friend.
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What a legacy your mum left you. And now you have picked up the mantle as the prayer warrior for your beautiful girls. Blessings to you and all, Lois. It’s a great gift to watch your mothering life from afar.
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What a beautiful gift, Michele! Yes! Every mother can be a prayer warrior. It’s probably the best thing we will ever do for our children, not just when they are tots but their whole lives through! Sharing this!
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Thanks, Beth. I agree– and the time they need our prayers the most are the seasons when we are least confident in how to pray.
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Mother’s Day can be such an emotive day, and very challenging for so many. This is a wonderful post, Michelle, and I am so very glad you shared it with the Hearth and Soul Link Party Community. Take care, and I wish you a Blessed Mother’s Day.
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And you as well!
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I hope you have a lovely Mother’s Day Michele. Ours has already come and gone in the UK, but we have Father’s Day next month to consider now. Thank you for joining us for #mischiefandmemories.
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Complicated holidays, for sure. Even so, lots to be grateful for!
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A good word of encouragement, Michele, “I suggest that this Mother’s Day can be a new beginning for you as you commit yourself to focused prayer for your children.”
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We all could benefit from a greater focus in our prayer life.
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[…] Prayer Warrior Challenge: You Don’t Have to Dread Mother’s Day this Year! “I remember clearly the momentous day when, deep in the weeds of Toddler Parenting, I realized I could do everything ‘right’ and still end up with a wayward child.” […]
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The huge responsibility of having children is daunting but so gratifying. I love how Mother’s Day and Father’s Day makes us appreciate our own parents as well as consider our own parenting. Thanks for linking up with #MischiefAndMemories
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Definitely a moment for taking inventory!
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Unlike my own mother, i have no expectations of or from my children. We have 5 children, our youngest has some issues with me, cause unknown even by his siblings, but they still all choose to come to me for help or to share their news.
Thanks for linking with #pocolo and hope to see you back again soon
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It’s a precious thing to have influence in our adult children ‘s lives!
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