To the Woman Who Feels Crowded by Christmas

To the Woman Who Feels Crowded by Christmas

We are covered to the elbows in red and green paint, but the festive wrapping paper stretched out to dry on the table before us more than justifies the mess. The toddler points to his distinctively tiny handprints and smiles his satisfaction, as his older brothers start wondering aloud about cocoa with candy cane stirrers. In that mental snapshot, I’m the tired mum, trusting that somehow I was helping my kids to connect the dots between homemade wrapping paper and the God who took on a body so he could save the world.

In the pursuit of Pinterest perfection superimposed upon catechesis, it’s easy to forget that family members will continue to require bath towels and clean underwear in the month of December, and that Advent season includes the routine preparation of at least 75 meals on top of all the other holiday baking and decorating. I wish I had known in those days of hand-crafted ornaments and caroling at the nursing home that Christmas is not a race or a responsibility, that celebration can be as small or as quiet as a story by candlelight—as imperfect and unassuming as a one-eyed gingerbread man.

If you are feeling crowded by Christmas—if you are looking at your calendar and your do-list and whispering, “How…?” it’s never too late to lower your expectations, lighten your load, and limit your activity level.

If you are feeling crowded by Christmas—if you are looking at your calendar and your do-list and whispering, “How…?” it’s never too late to lower your expectations, lighten your load, and limit your activity level.

In “Annunciation,” 15th-century poet John Donne painted a word picture of the incarnation as “immensity cloistered.” God the Son crowded himself into Mary’s womb, limited himself to human proportions, so that you and I can draw grace deep into our lungs, free of the need to perform. Christ’s willingness to hunker down, wizen up, and enter the darkness opens the door to his light and his life being formed in you and me.

A Spacious Celebration of Christmas

Every year, the four candles of Advent, symbols of hope, love, joy, and peace, rescue me by blazing the trail to a spacious celebration:

Hope looks like sitting at my dining room table with my Bible open to the pages between the Testaments—the ones that follow the scalding prophetic words and precede the red letters of grace. I imagine myself into the sandals of the faithful, and, pausing in that liminal space, I wonder about waiting and the nature of a sinewy watchfulness that keeps on trusting in the fulfillment of a centuries-old promise despite all evidence to the contrary.

Love assures me that God’s acceptance is not connected (either positively or negatively) with the number of check marks on my to-do list. Focusing on God’s unconditional love, shown by his gift of the Baby in the manger, schools me in the authentic gospel of giving in which the power and presence of God burst through all the shallow frippery and hoopla of a holiday run amuck.

If, as C.S. Lewis has said, “Joy is the serious business of heaven,” it behooves us to take it more seriously here on planet Earth. Complaining and comparing are joy slayers, but turning the spotlight on others with tiny acts of service and encouragement can be a two-way gift that brightens the recipient’s celebration and recalibrates the giver’s heart toward joy.

Peace can easily give way to panic by the fourth Sunday of Advent, especially if stress leads to blowing our budget, losing our temper, and resorting to sugar-fueled all-nighters of wrapping gifts and addressing Christmas cards. This is the moment for flexibility:  modifying or eliminating whatever won’t work; hanging on to those realistic expectations set up in the first week of December; and sticking close to the story that featured a manger, a fairly awkward set of circumstances, and all the messiness and chaos that surround a new birth.

When Christmas is severed from Truth, it lands like a burden—just one more Thing in the multitude of Things that need to be checked off my list. But, if I stay present to the wonder of Word made flesh, of Christ crowded into time and space and a feed box, God’s present-day proclamation lands in words that were given to lift loads and create space as they shimmered from angel lips and star song:

“God is with us.”

“Nothing shall be impossible.”

“Let every heart prepare him room.”

Holding You in the Light,

Every year, the four candles of Advent, symbols of hope, love, joy, and peace, rescue me by blazing the trail to a spacious celebration.

Free Encouragement in Your Inbox!

On the third Thursday of every month, I send a newsletter with biblical encouragement straight to my subscribers’ email inboxes. Frequently, I share free resources, and the newsletter is where everything lands first.

CLICK HERE to read my most recent newsletter where you’ll be given the opportunity to subscribe. I’m committed to the truth that women can become confident followers of God and students of his Word, and I want to help you along that path.


Looking for Challenging Devotional Reading that Encourages You to Seek Intimacy with God Every Day?

YouVersion Plans

As you know, I’m committed to the truth that women can become confident followers of God and students of his Word, and it’s my goal to help you along that path. At Living Our Days, I provide biblical content and resources to encourage biblical literacy and faithful living, and now I’m sharing devotional content on the YouVersion app. Visit my profile page to get free access to the reading plans!


I participate in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees. If you should decide to purchase any of the books or products I’ve shared, simply click on the book title, and you’ll be taken directly to the seller. If you decide to buy, I’ll receive a few pennies at no extra cost to you.

Photo by Debby Hudson on Unsplash

18 thoughts on “To the Woman Who Feels Crowded by Christmas”

  1. It is amazing how those four simple words truly remind us of the true meaning of Christmas. Celebrating ‘hope’ this morning was precious to me, especially with it being the first Sunday of the month and Communion. Michele, may this Advent hold many blessings for you and your family!

    Like

  2. I wish I’d learned when I was much younger that doing Christmas is much less stressful when you do Advent first. It’s easy to want to do “all the things” but like Mary and Martha, “all the things” may not be as needful as sitting close to the Lord, listening and waiting. Beautiful devotional reminder from those Advent candles.

    Like

  3. Anything without God-in-it becomes burdensome. You write: “God the Son crowded himself into Mary’s womb, limited himself to human proportions, so that you and I can draw grace deep into our lungs, free of the need to perform.” Beautifully word-smithed – and so very liberating. I am going to breath in the Hope of the first candle this week. I am so thankful that Hope was born each of us!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Michele, I started reading this on the way to our church service Sunday morning. I couldn’t get past the first paragraph that ended with the analogy of how Jesus wrapped Himself in human flesh as a gift to the world. I told Tom I’m stopping right here and thinking on this for awhile.
    My word for this year has been joy, tethered to joy, and this one picture opened the door of unexplainable joy for me. Imagine it even more when the first two songs we sang at church were: Joy To The World and God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen? “O tidings of comfort and joy.”
    It’s like God took my whole year’s pursuit of understanding the deeper meaning of true joy and literally wrapped it up, tied it with a beautiful ribbon of grace and gave it to me again for the first time.

    I so love how God speaks to you and your willingness to share it with us. You are dear to me.

    With much joy and gratitude,

    Debi

    Like

    1. This is so good to hear, and I remember our conversations in August about “tethered to joy.” And just this morning I was ministered to by reading the words of “Thou DIdst Leave Thy Throne.” Those carols…
      So beautiful!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Wise words. “When Christmas is severed from Truth, it lands like a burden—just one more Thing in the multitude of Things that need to be checked off my list.”

    Like

  6. The 75 meals statement froze me in my tracks! lol. But thankfully my dear husband has taken over a lot of the cooking since he retired, with no complaints from me. 🙂 I have reduced my Christmas schedule this year to maintain my peace. Thanks for the encouragement here, Michele.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I remember when that Advent math first occurred to me. It made me take a deep breath and be a little more forgiving of myself for all the things I didn’t get done that I had thought I would.

      Like

  7. Being flexible, choosing to lighten our load, and limiting our activity level, so that we can concentrate on relationships – with Him, family, and others – makes a huge difference during this season, Michele!

    Like

Leave a reply to strengthwithdignity Cancel reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.