Why is Confession Important? (I thought my sins were already forgiven!)

By the time my sons were old enough to talk, they were well-versed in the practice of apologizing. Four boys living in a modest-sized house have plenty of opportunity to bump into each other, both physically and relationally, but that’s not the only reason for the familiarity and frequency of apologetic words on this country hill. My own short fuse and sharp words often required that I send myself for a time-out! Afterwards, I would rejoin the family, and  “I was wrong; please forgive me,” were the words through which my sons were learning that their mother had not outgrown the struggle against sin.

Eventually, however, I became aware of the need to go a step further. I needed to name the offense. I needed to own it and call it by name, and we began to require the same offering of confession when there was a brotherly dispute or transgression.

“I’m sorry,” triggered the parental prompt:  “I’m sorry that I…” This invitation to the guilty party to be specific about his sin put words around it, gave it a name, and put its ugliness out there for forgiveness, but also for reflection. 

“How could I have done this to someone I love?”
“Is this the kind of person I want to be?”
“What does God say about this sin?”

For me, this practice required owning my impatience or my harsh words and acknowledging them as unjust and unholy:

“I’m sorry I raised my voice and spoke harsh words to you. Will you forgive me?”
“I’m sorry I was impatient today when I was helping you with your math. I will do better tomorrow, and I ask your forgiveness.” 

Confessing our sins to one another is a relationship-healing practice rooted in humility. It demonstrates that I value you, your feelings, and your boundaries more than my own need to “be right” or to feel good about myself. Even more important, as our children learn to confess their sins to one another and to parents who love them, they discover that honesty about sin strengthens family ties rather than severing them. From here, loving parents find a wide open door to teaching our children about confessing our sins to God.  

Confessing our sins to one another is a relationship-healing practice rooted in humility. It demonstrates that I value you, your feelings, and your boundaries more than my own need to “be right” or to feel good about myself.

Tweet

When Scripture promises that God is “faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9), God reveals the same heart we read about in the Old Testament, a heart that responded in mercy to a band of Palestinian wanderers who were bound to him by covenant but who, nevertheless, played fast and loose with their identity as the people of God.

Heartfelt Confession Leads to Worship

In Nehemiah’s day, Israel’s righteousness and obedience rested on shaky ground. However, as they began to understand God’s faithfulness to them across multiple generations, they were cut to the heart. Nehemiah 9 recounts their tearful confession and the long day of recommitment to God. As their leaders read from the Book of the Law for three hours about the sins of their fathers, they owned those deeds themselves and spent the next three hours admitting that they were no better.

From that long-ago spiritual practice, we see clearly that confession of sin led directly to worship. In the longest recorded prayer in the Old Testament (Nehemiah 9:5-38), we are able to witness yada, the Hebrew word for confession, in its fullest sense, for to our surprise, we discover that as Israel confessed their ancestral and personal unfaithfulness, they also confessed God’s goodness, his majesty, faithfulness, and compassion for their waywardness.

“But they and our fathers acted presumptuously and stiffened their neck and did not obey your commandments. They refused to obey and were not mindful of the wonders that you performed among them, but they stiffened their neck and appointed a leader to return to their slavery in Egypt. But you are a God ready to forgive, gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love, and did not forsake them.

(Nehemiah 9:16-17 emphasis added)

Heartfelt Confession Leads to Meaningful Reform

In Israel’s story, confession, which led to worship, continued on its way into reform. Under Nehemiah’s leadership, they began making room in their lives for Sabbath observance. They recommitted themselves to caring for the poor and living in purity before the Lord by resisting the pagan practices of surrounding nations. They repented of their disordered relationship with money, possessions, people, and work because, viewed against the blazing purity of God’s holiness, sin’s ugliness becomes devastatingly apparent: 

“Yet you have been righteous in all that has come upon us, for you have dealt faithfully and we have acted wickedly” (Nehemiah 9:33).

Confession is the means by which we align our hearts with God’s holiness. He is not surprised by our sin, and we are not providing information to him about the state of our hearts that’s not already apparent to an all-knowing God. Rather, we confess that “we have left undone those things which we ought to have done; and we have done those things which we ought not to have done” from a longing to stay in relationship with the only one in the universe who can come alongside us with power in the daily war against sin.

Confession is the means by which we align our hearts with God’s holiness.

Tweet

My confession to my children about my mothering failures would not change me unless I made the next crucial step of allowing God to use my repentance as a catalyst for meaningful change in my prone-to-wander heart:
“God, I confess I’m angry. I’m believing the lie that my kids’ behavior reflects on me, that my success is contingent upon their obedience or performance. I confess that you want me to love my children unconditionally and that your power, your righteousness in me is sufficient for this. Show me how to sink deep roots into my identity as a beloved child of God, separate from my identity or my ‘success’ as a mum.”

My Sin Will Not Thwart God’s Purposes

A prevailing flaw in popular theology is that “real” Christians will cease to struggle with sin. Of course, new believers see the holes in this theory and quickly sink into despair.

John, the beloved disciple, puts the error to death in his first letter:  “If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves” (1 John 1:8). Even so, the struggle to kill sin has destroyed the faith of a good many new believers,  sending their relationship with God crashing onto the rocks. 

While a new believer may be surprised by his continuing struggle against sin, how wonderful that God is not caught off guard! Persevering in truth from the Word of God, we find that our sin tendencies provide us with an opportunity to grow in our understanding of where to take the struggle. Our sin does not signal the end of our relationship with God. It’s a beginning, for it turns out that weakness is a powerful claim upon divine mercy. 

Confession of our sin invites the believer to a renewed awe of our great salvation as we discover that our loving heavenly Father has supplied every need for righteous living–in fact, it is only his righteousness that will suffice. This orientation provides a solid foundation for a lifelong relationship built on the assurance that my sin will not thwart God’s purposes.

The need to confess to one another and to God in no way diminishes the glorious forgiveness Christ achieved for us in his death and resurrection. His sacrifice “put away sin once for all” (Hebrews 9:26), so we don’t confess our sins in order to become or to remain God’s beloved children.

We name our sins to God because we are his beloved children. God’s instruction to confess our sins is a sign of our ongoing relationship-preserving agreement with God that our sin is grievous, and we want to forsake it.  

With our families, our friends, and with God, we are free to bring our sins out into the light, to call them by name, to bow in humble worship over God’s mercy, and to invite the Spirit’s renovation of our hearts.  The forgiveness of God is a gift already given. When we confess our sins, we also confess his goodness and our deep gratitude for the dearly purchased grace of Christ.

Holding You in the Light,

The forgiveness of God is a gift already given. When we confess our sins, we also confess his goodness and our deep gratitude for the dearly purchased grace of Christ.

Tweet

Free Encouragement in Your Inbox…

On the third Thursday of every month, I send a newsletter with biblical encouragement straight to my subscribers’ email inboxes. Frequently, I share free resources, and the newsletter is where everything lands first. I’m committed to the truth that women can become confident followers of God and students of his Word, and it’s my goal to help you along that path.

I am a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees. If you should decide to purchase any of the books or products I’ve shared, simply click on the image, and you’ll be taken directly to the seller. If you decide to buy, I’ll receive a few pennies at no extra cost to you.

Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash